We’ve all heard of work-life balance. It sounds simple enough, splitting your time 50/50 between work and everything else. If only life worked like that. The reality is, sometimes work needs more of my attention and I clock up the extra hours. Other times, my family or health takes priority.
So, does work-life balance actually exist? In a way, yes. But I believe it should be reframed as ‘work-life harmony’. The goal has never really been to keep work and life perfectly balanced, has it? It’s about creating enough flexibility to direct your attention where it’s needed most at any given time, without stressing about what you’re not doing.
I like to think I’ve become pretty good at this work-life harmony thing. Don’t get me wrong, it’s taken a couple of decades, plenty of upskilling and a bit of job-hopping to get here, but I wanted to share some of my experience and a few tips to hopefully help if you’re still stuck in the work-life ‘balance’ trap.
There are a few key ingredients to refine in the quest for great work-life harmony.
1. Know your (current) priorities
Mine? Family, work and home, in that order.
My happy little family unit consists of me, my husband, Mike, and our daughter, Maggie. I’m in early menopause, so we’re ‘one and done’ - not by choice, but we’re at peace with it. My wider family lives a couple of hours away, but we’re incredibly close and keep in touch through video calls, the family WhatsApp group, and in-person visits whenever possible.
My second priority is work. I genuinely love my job! I get to work with a fantastic team of extremely talented, creative, and funny people who brighten my day. I’m also lucky to work closely with some awesome clients who bring me really interesting content to work with. When I’m not with family, work is my happy place. But it hasn’t always been like this. I’ve worked in some terrible jobs since joining the workforce in the early 2000s. We’re talking misogynistic dinosaurs for bosses, badly designed telephony dialler systems, zero training, brutal treatment of customers, and absolutely no support during trying times. The silver lining came when I fell into a learning and development role and discovered digital learning. From there, I developed my skills and made career moves until I found what feels like my perfect job.
And my third priority, home. I confess, I’m a homebody, so that’s why this is a priority for me. To me, home means my house and everything that makes it feel like home, including the ridiculous number of chores that ‘should’ be (but rarely are) done on a daily basis - washing up, washing clothes, mopping and hoovering, tidying away clutter, wiping surfaces, putting washing away, weeding the garden, etc. With the best will in the world, I just don’t have time to do all that daily. But I do what I can, and it gives me purpose.
Now, have a think about your top three priorities. They might differ wildly to mine, but that's the point! Once you know what matters to you most, you’ll need to work out how you want it to fit together, which brings me to the next ingredient…
2. Make it sustainable
For me, work-life harmony isn't about maximising my time each day. Quite the opposite, in fact. I used to think being productive meant being constantly busy – getting up, going to work, coming home, doing chores, keeping everyone happy, catching up on messages, going to bed… and repeat. But this left me exhausted.
Now, I try to think about what’s sustainable. I’m blessed to benefit from a flexi time system at work, so I can slink off early when needed. And I work from home, so I can put a load of washing on (whenever I remember). I’m making my time work for the life I actually have. Sustainability has also taught me to accept that some things won't get done, and that’s okay. Who cares if there’s a pile of laundry in the lounge, or if the garden’s a little wild, right? Surprisingly, life goes on!
3. Look for flexibility
One of the biggest contributors to my work-life harmony is flexibility in where, when, and how I work. It removes a lot of the stress and worry about ‘getting everything done’. I realise I can’t do it all, even with flexibility, which is refreshing. And it gives me an appreciation for the little things, like being here to take a delivery, which I may otherwise miss. The other great thing about flexibility is that when I’m in the zone (my ‘hyperfocus’), I can keep working beyond my normal hours and not stress about it, knowing I’ll get the time back when it suits.
4. Find work that fits your life
This one took me a while. We spend a huge chunk of our lives working, and it’s natural to want it to fit in with our lives, rather than fitting our lives around it. Now that I work somewhere that gives me flexibility, trusts me to get on with my work, and allows me to have a life outside of it, I’m so thankful. But I didn't get here overnight.
For example, sometimes it's a case of 'right place, wrong time'. I worked at Learning Nexus previously between 2016 and 2018. I loved it back then – the projects and the people were great! But I don't drive and was commuting for between 3-4 hours PER DAY to get to and from the office. Classic example of right place, wrong time.
In 2018, I started working for a consultancy firm based in Bristol. I was brought in to help set up the digital learning arm of the business, and it involved a lot of upskilling and project planning (I taught myself Articulate Storyline and even got my PRINCE2 practitioner qualification!). I would go into the office once a week but the rest of the time, I was home working and I got so much personal time back. So, how did I end up back at LN? After the consultancy firm was bought by a global investment firm, the culture changed and we lost a lot of the magic, with people being TUPE'd to other roles and teams being combined to form big clumps of employee numbers, rather than teams of individuals.
In 2024, after returning from maternity leave, I decided I wanted to get back to my writing roots and went freelance. I ended up doing some work for LN, which reignited the fire in my belly to do more creative, hands-on client work. In late 2024, I approached LN, cap in hand, and asked if there were any employment opportunities coming up. The timing was just right, as they were about to advertise for another Learning Designer!
I went through the same application process as other applicants: the CV, filling in the blanks of 'the wilderness years' away from LN; the practical, submitting a short course I'd written and then built in Storyline; and the interview, which I was incredibly nervous about but needn't have been, as I was soon put at ease. I was over the moon to be offered the role of Learning Designer soon after and haven't looked back! The 2026 LN team has a different dynamic, but we're a close-knit bunch who all get on well, and I prefer it. Kim, the boss, is a phenomenal organiser and handles the scheduling beautifully, so we're free to focus on our work.
So, work-life harmony sometimes requires big thinking, big actions, and even bigger changes. As well as self-funding qualifications and putting the graft in, I’ve also learnt to set boundaries. Thankfully, my boundaries are never breached at LN. There's a huge amount of respect both ways for what the business needs, and what we, its people, need. Getting here has been scary at times... but so worth it!
5. Accept that harmony changes
My priorities aren't going to stay the same forever. I could become very ill, shifting health closer to the top of the list. I could set up a side hustle that bumps home down the list. There are times when my family needs more of me, and times when we’re slammed with projects at work, so I put my focus there. That's life.
So, don't think of work-life harmony as something to achieve and tick off your to do list. It’s ever evolving and something you need to keep adjusting. And good work-life harmony doesn’t mean feeling on top of the world all the time. Some weeks you’ll be smashing it, others you’ll be in a pit of despair (or there abouts). Both are okay, because you’re human. Emotions fluctuate, but having time and space to feel and process them is part of a strong work-life harmony.
Find your work-life harmony
If you feel like your work and personal life constantly fight for your attention, here are a few things that might help:
- Work out your non-negotiables: What matters to you? Family time? Exercise? Hobbies? Sleep? Time alone?
- Use flexibility where you can: Can you start earlier and finish earlier? Work from home sometimes? Move your hours around?
- Stop aiming for 50/50: Some days, work needs more of you. Other days, life needs more. And that’s okay.
- Set boundaries: Don’t be – or appear - permanently available. Define when your working day ends and protect your personal time.
- Don't confuse busy with productive: A full calendar doesn't mean you're achieving more. Sometimes, the most productive thing you can do is stop!
- Accept 'good enough' more often: Your house doesn't need to look like a show home. Your inbox doesn't need to be empty. Give yourself permission to lower the bar.
- Revisit your priorities: What worked for you five years ago might not work now. Check in with yourself periodically and ask if you’re spending time on what matters to you.
In conclusion
Work-life harmony is entirely possible. The secret is accepting that it won't always look harmonious. There’ll be busy periods, late nights, childcare issues, overflowing laundry baskets, and days when you feel like you've achieved nothing. That's not failure. It’s life!
For me, work-life harmony is about having enough flexibility, support, and self-awareness to give the right things my attention at the right time. And if that means putting a load of washing on between meetings, taking time out of work to attend an event at nursery, or deciding the garden can wait another week, I'll take that over a 50/50 balance any day.